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I've been seeing nightmares recently for what feels like every night but probably isn't. They gave me dread, and I could try and retell them.

But the last one left me with such profound sadness that I don't dare utter a word from it because what it's the other way around, and also because the pain is indesribable. It felt so real, mundane in its many details, and I can't tell you how scared I am-and how many reasons to be scared I have, I am scared even to try and transform it into a story or a poem(which do come and knock ) or anything, so it won't become alive.

Most of the times yes though, it helps, and some of these are very vivid, and I used to write them down the best I could. I'm much more talented when I dream I must say, I dreamt a few good novels even, then I forgot them of course.

As for Putin- I just wanted to kill him, very conciously, I mean I was surprised nobody there comes together and does it, but then realised it's futile as they all

a) depend on him b) are scared c) insert your own.

I also thought then : put me in one room with him, and what I gonna do? probably will notice how his eyes are sad, or something. almost always happens to me with all sorts of jerks- if impulsively, I can see myself at least doing something defensive, otherwise I'm completely inutile as an assassin. or a spy. It's a pity really-because I was born for intrigues and such, but then they brought me up against my nature lol.

In any case-thank you for the essay.. and sorry for a long comment..and now I'm scared to read the book)) But hope I will, sometime..it'll get better, right? No, I'm not sure it will-but today is the day to believe it.

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Not a long comment at all, thank you for sharing it, always happy to read your comments! I rarely see nightmares when I wake up scared, most of the time those would be me having teeth issues and such. Most of the dreams are just weird very local scenarios, completely detached from reality as it appears, like having a workout in a forest or being locked in a huge labyrinth-house. Tho daydreaming and reliving hypothetical scenarios is another matter, perhaps there I process more real things.

Re: the book. The first part is very dark, the second part is less so and has more non-violent humour, and I must mention the last story even ends on a hopeful note, tho bittersweet to some extent! Also, you might've seen some of the stories as I published them during 2023.

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Russia is a good slice of historical mania.

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Some bitterly, yet humorously, say Russia does what it does, and even exists, as a lesson and warning to the rest of the world not to attempt doing the same haha

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Thanks Vanya love your ideas and the beginning of the book. With the corruption of religion in this time, love the use of angelic characters to reclaim spirituality from the people who misuse it.

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My pleasure Henri! Thank you for reading

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My mom told me she had a dream about Putin.

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